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Joke of the day

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Santa:how many apples can u eat on empty stomach??

banta:i can eat 6 apples
santa:wrong, u can eat only 1 apple on empty stomach coz when u eat the 2nd thats not on empty stomach.

banta: super joke yaar i will tell this 2 my other friends
then banta went 2 his frnd

banta: how many apples can u eat on empty stomach??

frnd:10 apples.

banta:huut yaar 6 bolta toh mast joke sunata https://cdn1.desidime.com/assets/textile-editor/icon_smile.gif

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Super Moderator Super Moderator
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LOL! https://cdn1.desidime.com/assets/textile-editor/icon_smile.gif

Nice thread https://cdn1.desidime.com/assets/textile-editor/icon_smile.gif

I will also post some jokes in this thread whenever i come across them.

Dimer Of The Year 2011 Dimer Of The Year 2011
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https://cdn1.desidime.com/assets/textile-editor/icon_smile.gif Good one

Nice thread.

Shopping Friend Shopping Friend
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Which state in India has the highest English speaking population?

Before 8pm Kerala..

After 8pm HARYANA and PUNJAB! :p https://cdn2.desidime.com/assets/textile-editor/icon_wink.gif

Critic Critic
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एक आदमी मर गया और सीधा नरक में पहुंचा। वहां यमदूत ने उसका स्वागत किया और उसे नरक की सैर कराई। यमदूत ने कहा कि यहां तीन तरह के नरक-कक्ष है और उसे अपनी पसन्द का कक्ष चुनने की आजादी है। पहला कक्ष आग की लपटों और गर्म हवाओं से इस कदर भरा हुआ था कि वहां सांस लेना भी दूभर था। आदमी ने कहा कि वह इस नरक में रहना नहीं चाहेगा। यमदूत उसे दूसरे नरक कक्ष में ले गया । यह कक्ष सैंकड़ों आदमियों से भरा हुआ था और यमदूत बेरहमी से उनकी पिटाई कर रहे थे। चारों ओर चीखपुकार का माहौल था। आदमी यह सब देखकर घबरा गया और उसने यमदूत से अगला कक्ष दिखाने की प्रार्थना की। तीसरा और अंतिम कक्ष ऐसे लोगों से भरा हुआ था जो बस आराम कर रहे थे और कॉफी पी रहे थे। यहां अन्य दो कक्षों जैसी कष्टदायक कोई बात उसे नहीं दिखी। उसने यमदूत से कहा कि वह इसी कक्ष में रहना चाहता है। यमदूत ने उसे उसी कक्ष में छोड़ा और चला गया। आदमी ने एक कॉफी ली और आराम से एक तरफ बैठ गया। कुछ मिनटों बाद लाउडस्पीकर पर एक आवाज गूंजी – ‘’ब्रेक टाइम खत्म हुआ। अब फिर से दस हजार घूंसे खाने के लिये तैयार हो जाओ !’’

Deal Lieutenant Deal Lieutenant
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@DESI GUY… sirji….. HIMACHAL too…. aftr “8PM”;-}

Shopping Friend Shopping Friend
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Do dost cricket k bahut bade fan the…..din bhar bas cricket khelte,cricket ki bate karte bas cricket hi cricket…ek din ek accident me pehla dost mar jata hai https://cdn3.desidime.com/assets/textile-editor/icon_sad.gif

dusre dost ko uski kami bahut khalti hai wo ek sadu ke pass jata hai jo mar chuke logo se dusro ki batey karwata tha…uska mara dost samne aata hai
dusra dost usse puchta hai yaar tum swarg mein ho ya nark me

mara dost- nark me

zinda dost- too bad yaar

mara dost- Nark is not too bad yaar

Zinda dost- is cricket there?

mara dost- Oh ok i have two newz for you one is good and one is bad……..good newz is yes cricket is there and even a big match will be played tomorrow

zinda dost- What is bad newz?

mara dost- You will open our inning tomorrow

Shopping Friend Shopping Friend
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haha nice

royalabhayguleria wrote:

@DESI GUY… sirji….. HIMACHAL too…. aftr “8PM”;-}

Deal Cadet Deal Cadet
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Desi Guy wrote:

haha nice
royalabhayguleria wrote:

@DESI GUY… sirji….. HIMACHAL too…. aftr “8PM”;-}



Y Himachal— i got this msg in 2 ways- 1st veg msg→ Most Call centres 2nd >non veg Oh F**k Ohh F**K… (english):-P lol

Deal Cadet Deal Cadet
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Difference between horror and beautiful A beautiful night is wen u hug ur teddy bear nd sleep.. but horror is wen it hugs u bAck https://cdn2.desidime.com/assets/textile-editor/icon_wink.gif AAaaaaaaa…….

Deal Cadet Deal Cadet
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Q -Kalidas ka ek bhai
joote banata tha us ka naam kya tha ?
Ans: Adidas.

Super Moderator Super Moderator
Moderator
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martinoricky576 wrote:

Q -Kalidas ka ek bhai
joote banata tha us ka naam kya tha ?
Ans: Adidas.


Old one but still good https://cdn1.desidime.com/assets/textile-editor/icon_smile.gif

Shopping Friend Shopping Friend
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Jan Lokpal Bill’s Facebook Version:
.
.
Manmohan Singh Wrote On Anna’s Wall

Corruption Ka Nasha Pyaare , Nasha Sabse Nashila He

Jise Dekho Yaha Woh Corruption Ke Baarish Mein Geela He

Politics Ke Naam Pe Karte Sabhi Ab Bhrast-Leela He..
.
Anna Hazare Comments – "To Stop ol These Is Wat My Campaign Is Ol About..!!
.
Baba Ramdev & 5 Other Ppl Likes Anna Hazare’s Comment.!!
.
Baba Ramdev Comments : “Aur Mein Karu Toh Saala Character Dheela He..?” https://cdn2.desidime.com/assets/textile-editor/icon_toungueout.gif https://cdn1.desidime.com/assets/textile-editor/icon_biggrin.gif

Super Moderator Super Moderator
Moderator
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Sonia gandhi 1 school visit krne gyi…..1 class me a kar boli bachcho koi sawal puchna hai to pucho.

Papu bola mere 3 sawal hai

1) Aap khud prime minister kyu nahi bani
2) Ramleela maidan me police kisne bheji
3) Apka kitna paisa Swiss bank me hai.

Isse pehle ki Sonia ji jawab deti half time ke bell ho gayi.

After half time

Bablu khadha hokar bola Mam mere 5 sawal hai..
3 to Pappu wale hai

4) Half time ki bell 20min phle kaise baji?
Or akhiri sawal
?
Q5=Pappu kaha hai?

Shopping Friend Shopping Friend
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….Isse pehle ki Sonia Bablu ke 5 sawal ka jabab de pati final chuti ki bell go gayi

Qwerty wrote:

Sonia gandhi 1 school visit krne gyi…..1 class me a kar boli bachcho koi sawal puchna hai to pucho.

Papu bola mere 3 sawal hai

1) Aap khud prime minister kyu nahi bani
2) Ramleela maidan me police kisne bheji
3) Apka kitna paisa Swiss bank me hai.

Isse pehle ki Sonia ji jawab deti half time ke bell ho gayi.

After half time

Bablu khadha hokar bola Mam mere 5 sawal hai..
3 to Pappu wale hai

4) Half time ki bell 20min phle kaise baji?
Or akhiri sawal
?
Q5=Pappu kaha hai?


Shopping Friend Shopping Friend
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4 SHARABI 1 JANAZE KO UTHAKAR JALDI JALDI KABRO K UPAR SE JA RAHE THE,KISI NE KAHAOYE SHARAM KARO NICHE MURDE HAI
SHARABITOH UPAR KAUNSA WORLD CUP UTHA RAKHA HAI..HA HA HA

Deal Lieutenant Deal Lieutenant
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Desi Guy wrote:

4 SHARABI 1 JANAZE KO UTHAKAR JALDI JALDI KABRO K UPAR SE JA RAHE THE,KISI NE KAHAOYE SHARAM KARO NICHE MURDE HAI
SHARABITOH UPAR KAUNSA WORLD CUP UTHA RAKHA HAI..HA HA HA


gr8 joke…. https://cdn2.desidime.com/assets/textile-editor/icon_smile.gif;-}

Deal Lieutenant Deal Lieutenant
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This post is for All students sufferin from exams -

Kaali kaali khaali raato se
hone lagi Hai dostiiii.. https://cdn2.desidime.com/assets/textile-editor/icon_wink.gif

Khoya khoya in Kitabo mae
Aata mujhe, kuch bhi nahi..:-/

Hr Problem hr Concept main kaise sehta hu….:-/
Hr pal har lamha main khud se ye kehta rehta hu..

Tujhe bhula diya…
Tujhe bhula diya…:-(

phr kyun tere syllabus n mujhe
Rula diya.. Mujhe rula diya…!! https://cdn3.desidime.com/assets/textile-editor/icon_sad.gif

Deal Lieutenant Deal Lieutenant
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EK BAAR SANTA TRAIN ME CHADNE JAA RAHA THA., AAKASHWANI HUI.- “ISS TRAIN ME MAT CHADH, ISME BOMB HAI..” .., SANTA NHI CHADHA AUR BOMB FAT GAYA

PHIR SANTA BUS SE KAHIN JAA RAHA THA., AAKASHWANI HUI .-“ISS BUS ME MAT CHADH., YE KHAI ME GIR JAAYEGI..” ., SANTA NAHI CHADHA AUR BUS KHAI ME GIR GAYI

FIR EK DIN SANTA SHIP ME KAHIN JAA RAHA THA.., FIR SE AAKASHWANI HUI-.“IS SHIP ME MAT CHADH., YEH DOOB JAYEGI.” SANTA NE POOCHA KI AAP KAUN HO.., ??
UPAR SE AAWAZ AAYI.’ MAIN BHAGWAAN HU..
SANTA GUSSE ME BOLA..,- *JAB MAIN GHODU PAR CHADH RHA THA TAB KYA AAPKA LOUDSPEAKER KHARAB HO GYA THA.. ??:-};-}

Deal Lieutenant Deal Lieutenant
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Every Student Gets
0pportunit y To Enjoy
Their Student Life. . .
But ,
Some Miss Those Beautiful
Moments&Those Stupid
People Are Known As

.

.

.

.

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TOPPERS

Shopping Friend Shopping Friend
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Desi Guy wrote:

4 SHARABI 1 JANAZE KO UTHAKAR JALDI JALDI KABRO K UPAR SE JA RAHE THE,KISI NE KAHAOYE SHARAM KARO NICHE MURDE HAI
SHARABITOH UPAR KAUNSA WORLD CUP UTHA RAKHA HAI..HA HA HA


janaze matlab??

Deal Lieutenant Deal Lieutenant
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@BLING…. janaza matlab funerals of muslim

Deal Newbie Deal Newbie
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Really very funny post.I enjoy so much.Some jokes are old but still good and funny.
Glad to be apart of this forum.
Thanks…….

Super Moderator Super Moderator
Moderator
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….Isse pehle ki Sonia Bablu ke 5 sawal ka jabab de pati final chuti ki bell go gayi

LOL https://cdn1.desidime.com/assets/textile-editor/icon_smile.gif

Shopping Friend Shopping Friend
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Wife and Husband silent in a room
Wife thinks:
yeh mujh se baat kuon nahi kar rahe?
kya kisi aur larki k bare main soch rahe hain?
kya kisi aur ko pasand karne lage hain?
kya ab main inhain achi nahi lagti?
kya mere face pe wrinkles arahi hain?
kya mera weight barh raha hain?
kya yeh mujhe dhoka de rahe hain?
kyon yeh upset hain…..kyon?

Husband thinking:
Agar Ishant ko khilaya to bahar kaun hoga?

Critic Critic
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[CONTENT REMOVED]

Shopping Friend Shopping Friend
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1. HARD DISK Girls:
Remember everything forever.

2. RAM Girls:
Forgets about you the moment you turn her off.

3. SCREEN SAVER Girls:
Just for looking.

4. INTERNET Girls:
Difficult to access.

5. SERVER Girls:
Always busy when needed.

6. MULTIMEDIA Girls:
Makes horrible things looks beautiful.

7. VIRUS Girls :
These type of girls are normally called ‘WIFE
once enters in your system don’t leave even after format.

Critic Critic
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Desi Guy wrote:

1. HARD DISK Girls:
Remember everything forever.

2. RAM Girls:
Forgets about you the moment you turn her off.

3. SCREEN SAVER Girls:
Just for looking.

4. INTERNET Girls:
Difficult to access.

5. SERVER Girls:
Always busy when needed.

6. MULTIMEDIA Girls:
Makes horrible things looks beautiful.

7. VIRUS Girls :
These type of girls are normally called ‘WIFE
once enters in your system don’t leave even after format.


just LOL

Deal Hunter Deal Hunter
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really funny!!!!!!!!!!!
lolllllzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz

Shopping Friend Shopping Friend
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Bapu had a leakage in roof over the dining area.

Plumber: Sir when did u notice it?

Bapu: Last night when it took me 3 hours to finish my soup..!!!:)

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