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Husband Gave His Unfaithful Ex-Wife Half Of Everything He Owned – Literally

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Divorce settlements, which often force the two estranged spouses to split their belongings 50/50, can be both emotionally and financially painful. In an unambiguous and ironic gesture, one man in Germany told Laura, his ex-wife, just what he thought of her – by literally cutting all of their belongings in half!

The man is clearly experienced with the power tools that he has, because he’s actually done a great job of methodically and neatly destroying all of their stuff – everything from their teddy bear to their couch to their car has been sliced neatly in half. He is selling his half of everything on the eBay online auction site, where each item has a bitter but funny writeup in German detailing how the courts ordered him to ‘split’ their belongings even though he seems to suggest that Laura had been unfaithful.

We must assume that there’s a rather upset woman named Laura somewhere in Germany trying to figure out what to do with her half of a mailbox.

More info: eBay (h/t: cnbc)

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A priest was called away for an emergency. Not wanting to leave the confessional unattended, he called his rabbi friend from across the street and asked him to cover for him. The rabbi told him he wouldn’t know what to say, but the priest told him to come on over and he’d stay with him for a little bit and show him what to do.

The rabbi comes, and he and the priest are in the confessional. After a few minutes a woman enters and says, “Father forgive me for I have sinned.” The priest asks “What did you do?”. The woman says, “I committed adultery.” Priest: “How many times?” Woman: “Three times.” Priest: “Say two Hail Mary’s, put $5 in the box and go and sin no more.”

A few minutes later a man enters the confessional. He says “Father forgive me for I have sinned.” Priest: “What did you do?” Man: “I committed adultery.” Priest:“How many times?” Man: “Three times.” Priest: “Say two Hail Mary’s put $5 in the box and go and sin no more.”
The rabbi tells the priest that he thinks he’s got it, so the priest leaves.

A few minutes later another woman enters and says “Father forgive me for I have sinned.” Rabbi: “What did you do?” Woman: “I committed adultery.” Rabbi: “How many times?” Woman: “Once.”
Rabbi: “Go do it two more times. We have a special this week, three for $5.”

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