Abilene paradox
The Abilene Paradox
On my birthday a couple of years back, I wanted to take my family out for dinner. I asked my wife where we can go. Knowing that I like Gujarati food, she immediately said: “Let’s go to Agashiye – The Terrace Restaurant.”
My son and daughter both nodded in agreement. On return my son said: “I wish Pappa had taken us to Mainland China – he loves Chinese food.” “Or at least to Shere-E-Punjab for the wonderful tandoori chicken” added my daughter. “Yes, I too would have loved to go Mainland China”, I said.
My wife looked surprised: “But didn’t we all unanimously agree to go to Agashiye” she asked.
I said sheepishly “I didn’t want you to feel bad.” And both my children nodded in agreement. Here were four people who of their own volition would not have gone to ‘Agashiye – The Terrace Restaurant, but collectively agreed to go there.
This also happens in the corporate world. This is the Abilene Paradox. Prof. Jerry Harvey calls it “The Inability to Manage Agreement”.
Abilene Paradox occurs when a group of people collectively decide on a course of action that is contrary to the preferences of many of the individuals in the group.
Prof. Harvey states in his paper ‘The Abilene Paradox’: “Organizations frequently take actions in contradiction to what they really want to do and therefore defeat the very purpose they are trying to achieve”. This is the inability to manage agreement.
He adds: “The inability to manage agreement, not the inability to manage conflict, is the essential symptom that defines organizations caught in the web of the Abilene Paradox.”
In the corporate world, when the top boss throws an idea, the group immediately agrees. This is because everyone in the group thinks he would look stupid if he disagrees. Standing out as a lone voice is very embarrassing. This leads the group to decide on ‘yes’ when ‘no’ would have been the personal (and the correct) response of the majority.
I love this from Ayn Rand: “If we have an endless number of individual minds who are weak, meek, submissive and impotent – who renounce their creative supremacy for the sake of the “whole” and accept humbly the ‘whole’s verdict’ – we don’t get a collective super-brain. We get only the weak, meek, submissive and impotent collective mind.”
Our belly button is an amazing gift given to us by our God. A 62 year old man had poor vision in his left eye. He could hardly see especially at night and was told by eye specialists that his eyes were in a good condition but the only problem was that the veins supplying blood to his eyes were dried up and he would never be able to see again.
Homeopathy has a cure for this condition. In fact it not only has a cure for this condition but for veins which have dried up to any part of the body such as the ears, the brain, legs, arms, pancreas, lips, jaw etc.
According to Science, in all of creation, the first part created after the clot is formed is the belly button. After it’s created, it joins to the mother’s belly button through the umbilical chord.
Through this incredible gift that is given to us, which we may seem it to be insignificant, a new life is formed.
Our belly button is surely an amazing thing! According to science, after a person has passed away, the belly button is still warm for 3 hours the reason being when a woman conceives a child, her belly button supplies nourishment to the child through the child’s belly button. And a fully grown child is formed in 270 days = 9 months. This is the reason all our veins are connected to our belly button which makes it the focal point of our body. Belly button is life itself!
The “PECHOTI” is situated behind the belly button which has 72,000 plus veins over it. The total amount of blood vessels we have in our body are equal to twice the circumference of the earth.
CURES:
For dryness of eyes, poor eyesight, pancreas over or under working, cracked heels and lips, for glowing face, shiny hair, knee pain, shivering, lethargy, joint pains, dry skin.
REMEDY:
For dryness of eyes, poor eyesight, fungus in nails, glowing skin, shiny hair. At night before bed time, put 3 drops of pure ghee or coconut oil in your belly button and spread it 1 and half inches around your belly button
For knee pain At night before bed time, put 3 drops of castor oil in your belly button and spread it 1 and half inches around your belly button.
For shivering and lethargy, relief from joint pain, dry skin at night before bed time, put 3 drops of mustard oil in your belly button and spread it 1 and half inches around your belly button.
WHY PUT OIL IN YOUR BELLY BUTTON?
You belly button can detect which veins have dried up and pass this oil to it hence open them up.
When a baby has a stomach ache, we normally mix asafoetida (hing) and water or oil and apply around the naval. Within minutes the ache is cured. Oil works the same way.
Mom, I will Improve. 😔
https://kavithasriram.wordpress.com/2016/06/19/...
👆🏻very Nice article
Do read…at ur own time…it’s beautiful…change ur perception towards ur children….and do share. 🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏
Man, You are amazing.
Read few of your posts, very informative. God bless you.
This is what happens after 20 years of marriage….
While washing clothes, wife saw this lipstick 💋 mark on the shirt of her husband 😳😳
Wife: Tell me about this lipstick on your shirt.
Husband : Baby, I can explain!
Wife: I don’t care!! Just ask her the Brand and Shade No. !!!
😜😝💋💋😝😜😂😂😂
Nehi chahiye aisi biwi
CASE STUDY FOR PREP AND DISCUSSION ON 14 FEB
A woman was driving an old Volvo car when she mistakenly hit a 2016 Range Rover.
The lady came out from her Range Rover insulting the other lady for not being careful, asking her to repair her Range Rover.
The woman with the Volvo called her husband, he replied that he was busy, that she should try fix up things and that they will meet later at home.
The lady with the Range Rover called her boyfriend and said "sweetheart someone just hit the birthday gift you gave me, I am so angry, pls come over.
Few minutes later her boyfriend arrived.
Guess what? He is the husband to the lady with the Volvo car.
Discuss the possible short term and long term outcomes. (20Marks)
You are a Rockstar man. Loved reading your post.
Happy 2 years at dd
“Lexophile” is a word used to describe those that have a love for words, such as “you can tune a piano, but you can’t tuna fish”, or “to write with a broken pencil is pointless.”
.. When fish are in schools, they sometimes take debate.
.. A thief who stole a calendar got twelve months.
.. When the smog lifts in Los Angeles U.C.L.A.
.. The batteries were given out free of charge.
.. A dentist and a manicurist married. They fought tooth and nail.
.. A will is a dead giveaway.
.. With her marriage, she got a new name and a dress.
.. A boiled egg is hard to beat.
.. When you’ve seen one shopping center you’ve seen a mall.
.. Police were summoned to a daycare center where a three-year-old was
resisting a rest.
.. Did you hear about the fellow whose entire left side was cut off? He’s
all right now.
.. A bicycle can’t stand alone; it’s just two tired.
.. When a clock is hungry it goes back four seconds.
.. The guy who fell onto an upholstery machine is now fully recovered.
.. He had a photographic memory which was never developed.
.. When she saw her first strands of grey hair she thought she’d dye.
.. Acupuncture is a jab well done. That’s the point of it.
@A2Zdeals @prinkle @ros_guy @Plato @asoka @no fpd @vijkap201 @AKA @srocks @Smarty @Navneet @vishusgh @Bhaveshdave @Tejaa @abhimishra @sukhichd710 @mahidada @eskimo @disclaimer @Augustus @forgotten
Loving our children in a real way:
Loving my daughter comes so easily when
she wins a competition,
gets high marks,
listens to me,
keeps her room clean,
finishes her food,
pays attention while studying,
sleeps on time,
Never raises her voice and
practices dance/singing/drawing without me reminding her.
That’s the easy way to love….
However when I look back at my childhood I realize that the moments I really wanted love badly were when
I scored less marks,
failed in a competition,
couldn’t fall asleep,
Didn’t feel like studying,
Wanted to laze around,
Didn’t finish the Tiffin,
Didn’t complete homework,
Forgot an important assignment,
Fought with a friend,
Had a heartbreak,
Committed a mistake,
Felt guilty,
Felt lonely….
These were the moments when I needed my parents the most, I needed their assurance that it is okay to be human, to fall, to get hurt and what I wanted to listen in those moments was, “i know it hurts, but I’m here with you. Maybe we can’t do anything about what happened, but I’m here with you. And I love you for what you are, always.”
This is real and unconditional way to love!
Yes I wanted to hear, “I love you” loud and clear….it was the only thing that could heal my heart. Love!
It’s the moments when we lose control of ourselves that we want someone to hold us, isn’t it? You don’t need to be perfect….just be real!
Do you chose love the easy way or the real, unconditional way?
Today no matter what your child does, choose Love and see how it heals you as a parent.
-©Gayatri Aptekar, 2017
Parent Coach, Therapist
When Insults Had Class
***********************
There was a time when words were used beautifully.
These glorious insults and a witty response takes the bitterness away.
Even makes it enjoyable to the reader !!
The exchange between Churchill and Lady Astor:
She said, “If you were my husband, I’d give you poison!!”
and he said, “If you were my wife, I’d take it.”
😴💤💤🐊
Gladstone, a Member of Parliament, to Benjamin Disraeli: “Sir, you will either die on the gallows, or of some unspeakable disease.”
“That depends, sir”, said Disraeli, “On whether I embrace your policies, or your mistress.”
😴💤💤🐊
“He has all the virtues I dislike, and none of the vices I admire.”
– Winston Churchill
😴💤💤🐊
“I have never killed a man, but I have read many obituaries with great pleasure.”
– Clarence Darrow
😴💤💤🐊
“He has never been known to use a word, that might send a reader to the dictionary.”
– William Faulkner (about Ernest Hemingway)
😴💤💤🐊
“Thank you for sending me a copy of your book; I’ll waste no time reading it.”
– Moses Hadas
😴💤💤🐊
“I didn’t attend the funeral, but I sent a nice letter saying I approved of it.”
– Mark Twain
😴💤💤🐊
“He has no enemies, but is intensely disliked by his friends.”
– Oscar Wilde
😴💤💤🐊
“I am enclosing two tickets to the first night of my new play; bring a friend . . . if you have one.”
– George Bernard Shaw to Winston Churchill
“Cannot possibly attend first night; will attend second . . . ,
if there is one.”
– Winston Churchill, in response.
😴💤💤🐊
“I’ve just learned about his illness. Let’s hope, it’s nothing trivial.”
– Irvin S. Cobb
😴💤💤🐊
“He is not only dull himself, he is the cause of dullness in others.”
- Samuel Johnson
😴💤💤🐊
“Some cause happiness wherever they go; others, whenever they go.”
– Oscar Wilde
😴💤💤🐊
“He uses statistics as a drunken man uses lamp-posts .. . . for support rather than illumination.”
– Andrew Lang
😴💤💤🐊
![Swiggy Instamart: Unibic Choco Kiss Cookies 500gm at ₹70 [location specific]](https://cdn0.desidime.com/topics/photos/1780439/medium/Screenshot_20240425-225254.png?1714065972)
When you meet a person, your bodies begin to converse, in the body language. The real communication starts non-verbally. This real communication takes over automatically. In fact this communication is part of the interaction of you two with the total environment of atoms, particles, energies…all impacting on you two. If you allow pleasant and positive thoughts about the other person, and also have an optimistic outlook in general, friendship sprouts without a single word spoken. Positivism builds on positivism, creating the big bang of the butter fly effect.
The best method of developing the positivism is to suspend the use of words and start feeling pleasantly, giving the other person respect for the other’s individuality. Atoms and energies in the invisible spectrum take over completing the positive job. Our bodies always establish the truthful relationship. When that relationship is positive, you want to meet that person again and again. May be the process of quantum entanglement, where an effect on a particle automatically results in an effect on its particle twin at a speed several times faster than light takes over in the realm of thought—-the realm of consciousness, unfortunately deliberately ignored by the sciences today in loyalty to the fantasy that only inanimate things which are not capable of thought interact mechanically and thoughtlessly. We have to realize that our environment is a living entity.
A positive person radiates positivism in conversation, in written communications, in the topics chosen for writing…all of which fill the other person with positivism. The person becomes the personification of hope, the real leader.
Every word, phrase, clause, sentence, essay, book…shall be weighed in terms of the positive and negative effects. In fact that must be the job of editing, not the present method of surgery for mechanical clarity. Unfortunately most editors today want to be mechanics, dealing with write ups as machines for repair or better productivity.
While positivism creates positive all round health, negative thoughts about the other person create negative quantum communication. One must realize that body language accounts for 100% of the total communication and words simply change. Communication with words actually distorts the real communication.
One method of positive interaction when you cannot meet people is to select a mission that brings smile to many and strive for the mission. Unfortunately chronically negative people, mix up your effort while positive people help after they understand. But self respect born out of sincerety helps one to carry on with one’s mission.
YM