Laugh Out Seriously! :D
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“The sense of humour should be directed towards oneself. It is a very great thing to laugh at oneself, and he who can laugh at himself gradually becomes full of concern and compassion for others.
In the entire world no event, no subject invites laughter like oneself."
— Osho
mohbbat wo haseen gunha
hai… jise har insan khushi khushi krta hai….
par mohbbat me intezar wo saza hai…. Jo sirf
wo hi krta h jo sach me mohbbat karta
hai….
Q. Kashmir aur biwi mein kya samanta hai…..
Ans. Waise to dono hi samasya hai… par padosi nazar daale to gussa aata hai…
See how people write leave applications. It’s murder of the English language….
An employee applied for leave as follows:“Since I have to go to my village to sell my land along with my wife ,
please sanction me one week leave.”
________________________________
From an employee who was performing the “mundane” ceremony of his 10 year old son:
“As I want to shave my son’s head , please leave me for two days..”
________________________________
From . Administration Dept:
“As my mother-in-law has expired and I am only one responsible for it please grant me 10 days leave.”
________________________________
Another employee applied for half day leave as follows:
“Since I’ve to go to the cremation ground at 10 o’clock and I may not
return, please grant me half day casual leave”
________________________________
An incident of a leave letter:
“I am suffering from fever, please declare one day holiday.”
________________________________
A leave letter to the headmaster:
“As I am studying in this school I am suffering from headache. I request you to leave me today”
________________________________
Another leave letter written to the headmaster:
“As my headache is paining , please grant me leave for the day.”
-——————————————————————————-
Actual letter written for application of leave:
“My wife is suffering from sickness and as I am her only husband at
home I may be granted leave”.
________________________________
Letter writing:-
“I am well here and hope you are also in the same well.”
Petrol pump se 21 Km door 1 Fauji k truck ka petrol khatam ho gaya.
2nd seat par Major baitha tha.
Sardar driver ne Major ko bataya
k Sir Petrol pump tak dhakka lagana padega.
Sub neeche utre aur dhakka lagana shuru kia. Kaafi der baad petrol pump par pahunch gaye.
Kucch jawan thak
k behosh ho gaye.
Sardar ne petrol dalwana shuru kia
to Major ne kaha
k peechhe jo drum hai usmein bhi dalwa lo.
Sardar : Sir,
Wo to full hai….
Emergency k liye rakha hua hai.
Drunk puppy!
I recently saw a distraught young lady weeping beside her car. ‘Do you need some help?’ I asked.
She replied, ‘I knew It! should have replaced the battery to this remote doorunlocker. Now I can’t get into my car. Do you think they (pointing to a distant convenience store) would have a battery to fit this?’
‘Hmmm, I don’t know. Do you have an alarm, too?’ I asked.
‘No, just this remote thingy,’ she answered, handing it and the car keys to me.
I took the key and manually unlocked the door.
एक माँ अपने 6 साल के बच्चे का फोटो खिंचवाने के लिए फोटो-स्टूडियो लेकर गई.
फोटोग्राफर बच्चे को पुचकारते हुए बोला – “बेटा, मेरी तरफ देखो … इस कैमरे से अभी कबूतर निकलेगा !”
बच्चा -
“फोकस एडजस्ट कर,
जाहिलों जैसी बातें मत कर,
पोर्ट्रेट मोड यूज करना, मैक्रो के साथ,
ISO 200 के अंदर रखना,
High resolution में pic आनी चाहिए …
Facebook पे अपलोड करनी है, वरना पैसे नहीं मिलेंगे ….
‘कबूतर निकलेगा….’
तेरे बाप ने कबूतर डाला था कैमरे में
There was a family with one kid. One day the mother was out and dad was in charge of the kid, who just turned three.
Someone had given the kid a little ‘tea set’ as a birthday gift and it was one of his favorite toys.
Daddy was in the living room engrossed in the evening news when kid brought Daddy a little cup of ‘tea’, which was just water.
After several cups of tea and lots of praise from father for such yummy tea, kid’s Mom came home.
Dad made her wait in the living room to watch the kid bring him a cup of tea, because it was ‘just the cutest thing!!’
Mom waited, and sure enough, the kid comes down the hall with a cup of tea for Daddy and she watches him drink it up, then she says to him, ‘Did it ever come to your mind that the only place that baby can reach to get water is the toilet??’
….Mothers know!!!
MORAL OF THE STORY:
Domain knowledge is very important!!! Else your supplier will trick you.
*Duniya 🌎 K 2 *
*sabse Mushkil *
Kaam
*1-Apni *
*baat Kisi Aur *
*Ke dimag Me *
*Fit Krna..! *
*2- *
*Kisi Aur Ka *
*Paisa Apni *
*Jeib Mein *
*shift karna! *
*Jo Pehle Me *
*Kamyab *
*Hota
Hai, *
*Usey *
"Teacher"Keh
te Hai,
*Jo *
*Dusre Me *
*Kamyab *
*Hota
Hai, *
*Usey "Business *
*Man" Kahte *
hai
*Aur Jo *
*Dono Me *
*Kamyab
Hoti *
Hai Usey…
*"WIFE" Kahte *
Hain.;
〰〰
एक आदमी की शादी को बीस साल हो गए
उसने कभी अपनी पत्नी के हाथ से बने खाने की तारीफ नहीं की।।
उसको निर्मल बाबा ने सलाह दी.. की पत्नी के खाने की तारीफ करो कृपा होगी
बाबा की बात उस पर असर कर गयी
घर आकर पराठे खाकर उसने तारीफ की बरसात कर दी।।
पत्नी ने बेलन उठाया और भरी ठंड में कान के पास बजाते हुए बोली -:
बीस साल से मेरे खाने की तारीफ नहीं की,
और आज पड़ोसन ने पराठे क्या भेज दिए तो तुम्हे ज़िन्दगी का मज़ा आ ही गया
पति मन में ही बोला— : बाबा कृपा हो गयी..